Dating machine in 2013 aka "you gotta play to win"

*This is a quickie and being sent from my phone so it's kind of a stream of consciousness deal*

One of my goals this year is to become a dating machine. I have finally realized that husbands don't just knock on your door while you are watching Bravo and eating Trader Joe's Soy Creamy (in cherry) ice cream. I mean that ice cream is bomb and amazing but there is no frozen man in the bottom of the carton...I've done the research!

To this end I have decided to focus a great deal of my energy this year into dating aka "husband hunting". (Please spare me the "girl don't look for him he'll just show up when you least expect it" bullshit because not looking has gotten me nothing)

I understand the premise but you have to put yourself in situations if you want to make things happen. Be social, get out of the house, etc. I don't think this means throw yourself at anything with a penis. I think that it means that you have to be happy enough with yourself so that you have a life of your own and a man becomes an asset or enhancement as opposed to your everything.

I have a adopted a whole new philosophy around dating. I'm not going to start throwing myself at them. I'll just put myself in situations where I can meet more men. I will push myself to try to get out of my comfort zone (aka house) and I will suspend all judgement of any interactions or people (ok ok so he's 5'6...he could be the shorty of my dreams). I'm going to open myself up for the possibility and wonderment of it all. The good, the bad, the ugly and the "damn sure won't be doing that again"

Does this mean I'm gonna become a doormat? A submissive "don't say this or that because you don't want to scare him off girl"? No way!

I'm still going to be me (smart ass, rude joke telling, drinking champagne on a Tuesday just because it's a damn Tuesday) self. Except this time I'm fully equipped with a set of shiny new boundaries and a take no prisoners attitude! (I'll also have parting gifts for those who don't make it out alive).

So this is a very brief cursory not fully thought out post about my attitude and regarding dating...which I fully think that a lot of women of color miss out on...we gotta change that by the way because honestly this shit is FUN!

I don't share the Charlotte York "I've been dating since I was 13 where is he" mentality.. No no no my friends right now I'm right in the thick of the "wait you're going to take me out, ply me with good (hopefully) food and good drinks and we get to see if we like each other?!" Sign.me.up.

There will be disappointments let downs and the like BUT I'm going in to this positive and pray I come out the other side alive. So....ready, set, go!